Do you know this is the reason why so many individuals find themselves repeatedly being frustrated in their attempts to secure a happy, healthy and loving relationship? Do you know that it is now possible to make these old subconscious negative patterns conscious and finally delete them so that you can take control of yourself and your relationship life back?
Do you know this can make the difference between failing again and truly being successful? Want to learn more?
Like two porcupines whose respective quills go up at a perceived threat often couples find themselves automatically and hypnotically behaving in exactly the same way. This leads to defensive confrontational posturing that is at the very heart of relationship conflict. So why does this happen and what can be done about it to prevent the demise of one's valued relationships?
Well, it turns out that the perceived "threat" in itself is often not the problem, rather it is what that threat "re-triggers" in the respective individuals. So what do I mean by that?
Well suppose you had a past relationship in which you were betrayed, rejected and then ultimately abandoned; the memory of that event along with all the emotional pain associated with it still lives inside you. Now I know that many individuals will say that "they have gotten over it" or have "worked it through" with some form of therapy or other.
It has been my experience however that as long as the "memory" is still there then so is the emotional pain associated with it. Now I know many will disagree with me on that last point because they will say they can no longer "feel" the pain and hence will attempt to argue that it is no longer there. Often when this is one's experience it often means that the pain has become sufficiently "submerged" within the subconscious mind that they have effectively become numb to it.
That however is much like taking a pain killer to ease some physical pain and believing that the cause of the pain, and the pain itself, is gone simply because the pain can not be felt. Does that sound sensible to you? Hardly!
You see, the memory "is" the source of the pain i.e. there would be no pain only if there was no memory present. That means effectively that as long as the memory is there the pain will be also. That also implies that the old pain also can be re-triggered by present events in a current relationship thus leaving the individual falling into a defensive hypnotic-like trance that sends them emotionally back to the early negative experience.
When this happens the person loses control of themselves, the ability to discern accurately what is taking place and of the ability to make rational and appropriate choices that will be self respecting and relationship respecting. In other words they have the tendency to resort to automatic subconsciously driven and self destructive tendencies such as attempting to control, manipulate, argue with, or withdraw from the partner.
This can lead to a great deal of conflict and confusion that can irreparably harm the health of the relationship. So what can be done about this automatic hijacking that takes place?
Well, it becomes imperative to permanently deactivate those "old files" known by many as old emotional baggage. Is this even possible?
A decade ago a new coaching process was developed that has helped individuals and couples literally delete these old self sabotaging files this leaving them fully conscious, discerning, resilient, secure, empowered, self assured, worthy, self validating, self directed, and full present to navigate their relationships into safe and secure harbours.
To learn more about this process and to begin to save your relationship from failing kindly visit the web site below where you can also request a free introductory telephone/Skype coaching consultation to begin to take you there.
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